


Thinks Like a Romance Novel

by Spammy_Wits



Series: Wrong Genre Savvy [2]
Category: Miraculous Ladybug
Genre: Adrien deals with extreme confusion, Adrien kicks the cheesy up a notch, Fluff, I'm reading too many Tv Tropes, Identity Reveal, Marinette's too practical for her own good, Master of Mixed Signals, What is romance? Can you eat it?, cliche galore
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-11-15
Updated: 2018-06-08
Packaged: 2018-08-31 02:46:53
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 7,353
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8560426
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Spammy_Wits/pseuds/Spammy_Wits
Summary: Soon enough pink and green light surrounded them and he couldn’t make himself blink despite the discomfort in his eyes, afraid that if he did so the magic evening would fade away with his dreams… And what a dream it was… The red mask flew away in a cloud of bubbles leaving behind the most amazing person he’d ever met...





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> https://www.deezer.com/en/playlist/2541069808  
> If you want to listen to some background music while you read ;D

The moment had finally arrived.

He could list a few of the things that overwhelmed his senses from the top of his head: The sunset dressing the city in shadows, the most beautiful hues of orange and violet flowing around them like a dream, the sun hiding behind her, the moon rising to his back.

Some accordion player by the Eiffel tower, far away, played L'imprévue while the scent of fresh bread and cinnamon traveled across the street, carried by gentle breeze. Spring at its best, Paris below clearly alive and happy.

His heart danced to the beat while the girl of his dreams kept her eyes closed in concentration, at the count of three, she said… Soon enough, pink and green light surrounded them and he couldn’t make himself blink despite the discomfort in his eyes; afraid that if he did so the magic evening would fade away with his dreams… And what a dream it was… At last, the red mask flew away in a cloud of bubbles leaving behind the most amazing person he’d ever met. He could feel the affection swelling in his heart, trying to escape him to go and settle forever near those beautiful blue eyes that slowly opened, with the innocence of a dove, piercing his very soul; the biggest eyes he’d ever seen on her face. He took it as a good sign; He couldn’t help himself, who could blame him? Romance was in the air and he’d be a fool not to heed its call, tears blurred his sight as he got closer. Marinette… My lady… 

“My Marinette…” He heard himself whisper oh so tenderly as he leaned in…

“Chat! Can you focus for a second? This is important!” Startled, he rubbed his eyes and looked in the direction of the voice, she had made a long distance in quite a short amount of time and mumbled quickly to herself while she paced around the roof, not bothering to throw him even a second glance. He straightened up and tried to compose himself before walking towards her. “What’s the matter?” He said nonchalantly, fighting to subdue his disappointment.

“What’s the matter?! Are you serious?! We’ve been giving the worst excuses ever and disappearing at the same time for so long it’s a wonder we haven’t been discovered yet! We have to rethink our whole strategy! That’s 'the matter'…! This is bad… Does Papillion know…? No… He would have attacked our families already… But he usually sends the akumas to our school… Maybe he suspects we’re in the area…? Then he is too close, this is bad… What should we do…?” She kept at it for a few minutes giving Adrien a chance to return to reality, that’s right. She had decided that the pros outnumbered the cons after too many times their civilian selves were compromised by the enemy, being unable to transform, it was never about trust or feelings. How could he forget that so easily? If only swooping her off her feet were as easy as being a distracted doofus. “-then we’ll have to leave for Italy and that’d be terrible because I left the recipe for Ciabatta to burn with the house! I can't afford to join the mafia, I'm a superhero!” He was really trying to pay attention but it seemed like the conversation had taken a drastic turn towards an exile slash action movie. Suddenly she flipped around to face him while raising her arms in what he could only describe as an _'eureka!’_ pose.

“That’s it! We need rules!” Well, that was worse than joining in the movie, even if it had a criminally awful plot. His reticence must have showed since she went blank after looking at his face. Chat Noir was his only freedom at the moment, wouldn’t extra rules ruin that? Her expression turned to concern and with a nudge of her foot he knew he’d have to voice his thoughts.

“Rules… About what? Are we not doing a good enough job at hiding? I’m pretty sure you’re the only one who knows right now…We’re still going to hang out together right? I mean…We’re still a team right?”

“I’m sorry Adrien… I know how much you love doing this but you must admit that we’re being too obvious. Don’t worry; I’ll come up with something that works for us both. You won’t have to stop doing your thing and I won’t take away your freedom, I can promise you that.” Somehow... They had ended pressed against each other like so many times before, under disguise. He raised his hand to her cheek and felt himself smile at her reassurance. The stars above looked even brighter in her eyes. With a slight motion, he tucked a lose strand of hair behind her ear.

“I sure hope so, my lady.”

 


	2. Chapter 2

He hadn’t seen her since the big reveal, that is, the whole weekend; considering her reaction, equal parts of dejection and fear had prevented him from reaching out first. So, when he received a call from her on Sunday saying she’d be visiting that afternoon he was practically jumping with happiness.

“Don’t you get it, Plagg? Any moment now she’ll come in through that window and we’ll be together, alone, in my room! Who knows for how long! It’ll be just like a date…” He sighed dreamily while moving every pillow in the mansion towards his room in hopes of convincing her to stay the night. He already had made a trip out to hunt for the best sweets in Paris, and he’d arranged them to look like flowers on his desk, wouldn’t it be grand if she were to be impressed by his efforts?

The cat kwami, not even the least bit amused gave a shake of his head, and followed him with its arms crossed. “I’m just saying she was pretty vague, I think if she wanted to hang out with you she’d said it over the phone, isn’t she supposed to be a nice person? She didn’t even ask if you were busy. Which you are, by the way.”

“I don’t know, maybe it slipped her mind? Homework can wait, in the other hand she could do anything she wants with her time but she decided to bestow me with her company instead. What else can I say? It doesn’t hurt to try anyways.”

“You and me both know it does, just…Keep your expectations to the minimum. Alright, kid?” That’s when he was interrupted by a noise coming from the lobby, the teen, surprised, let go of his armful of pillows and ran for the door, which opened just as Nathalie stopped behind him.

“Marinette? Why are you-? I mean, nice to see you! Come on in!” He couldn’t help but wonder about the reason why she had a folder in her arms, but he guessed she’d explain later, so he took her hand and started pulling just to notice that she wouldn’t budge.

“Mme. Sancoeur, a pleasure to meet you! I believe I have an appointment.” At that Nathalie walked closer and gave the blond a stern look, before turning her attention to the girl. His confusion was evident.

“Indeed, Monsieur Agreste will see you in a few minutes. Please wait here while I inform him about your arrival.” Then she started climbing the stairs, speaking to him one last time before leaving. ”Adrien, I’m pretty sure the floor is not the place those pillows belong to, do not make me tell your father.”

Shrugging off his embarrassment, he turned to his partner placing his hand on her shoulder.

“What was that about? What are you doing? Why do you want to see my father? Why did you use the front door?!” Maybe he was speaking too quickly, he could feel himself starting to panic. If she’d told him, he’d have prepared her to talk to his father, what if she was banned from being his friend just like he did with Nino? What if she ruined her career by getting in a feud with the best designer in the world? What if he never gave them his blessing to get married?!

“I’ve got a plan. Just follow my lead!” She whispered. Those words were magic on his nerves, no exceptions, Ladybug had a plan! She’d move mountains if she set her mind to it, without a doubt she’d manage and he’d be there at her side when she did. He raised her hand towards him and made a new attempt at kissing her knuckles but Nathalie had already prompted her to go up, she slipped away just like every single time before... One would think he’d be used to it by now, still, he silently sulked behind them.


	3. Chapter 3

He was so utterly insignificant... Once again he failed to read the situation, to read _her_. As they approached his father’s office he couldn’t even try to guess the real reason for her visit. He absentmindedly noticed the door close as Nathalie left them. Then, he nearly jumped.  The realization that he was in front of his father sobered him up instantly. Marinette had already traversed the room and was purposefully taking a seat and he didn’t know what to do with himself, standing by the door and staring blankly at the desk. Not that it mattered anyways, the conversation didn’t seem to require him even the slightest.

Though maybe ‘conversation’ wasn’t the right word, they talked quickly, threats, bargains, suggestions even bribery came up. They weren’t having a conversation, it was a verbal duel, and he didn’t even know what it was about!

“Enough! I do not care what childish reason you have for coming here, giving me an ultimatum about lawsuits, reporters or superheroes whatsoever! He’s my son! He’ll do what I decide is best for him and be where and with whom I deem suitable and safe and I won’t allow you to make a circus show out of this!”

“Well, he’ll keep being your son even if he’s also my partner! What do you even need another employee for!?” They were both out of energy, both flustered, both so horribly unreasonable. At least now he knew what they we’re fighting over. His father’s face softened for a second, an unreadable expression on his face, silence taking over until she whispered. “You claim he’s so important, yet you didn’t even notice he’s been here the whole time.”

That was a low blow; his father spared him a sideways glance before focusing his gaze to the floor.

“…Partners, you say? Is that true, Adrien?” He had never seen him like that… Like he was ashamed or being reprimanded. Marinette sent and encouraging smile his way and he felt himself blush. He made a conscious effort to keep his arm hanging instead of rubbing his neck.

“I…Ugh…Yes, father.”

As the man straightened himself once again, grabbing the lapel of his suit with his thumb in a demonstration of confidence, he directed his eyes at the girl, seemingly satisfied.

“I’d like to speak with mademoiselle Dupain-Cheng alone for a minute, about this partnership of yours.”

Hastily, he headed back from where he came but, even if the worst was over, he couldn’t help but look back one last time before exiting the office. Catching one last bit of what was being said.

“His curriculum is designed specifically for his development and it has no such ‘holes’ as you call them. He shall spare no moment of his time in trivialities”

“Trivialities…?” She seemed outraged but shook her head as to rid herself of her anger. After a deep breath she continued, in a non-confrontational tone. “Excuse me sir, but did your wife handle the sponsors and clients when you started your business?”

Taken aback, Gabriel flinched but quickly returned to his stern expression. “Why is that the conclusion you’ve arrived to?”

Then, he closed the door.

 

***

He was losing his chill, he was so losing his chill. He looked at his cellphone once again to check the time, they’d been in there so long. He initially thought he’d be procrastinating in his room with his lady today. He certainly didn’t expect any of this. What was she trying to do? Why? It seemed so random! And Plagg, the impish cat just kept throwing amused comments every five minutes.

“Hey! This reminds me of the salt routes back in the day, she’s totally trying to buy you off! Do you know roman history? To think she’d be so fiery! Haha!” As a precaution the kwami stayed inside his clothes but it was clear he wanted to go out and dance in his face with that smug smile of his. He just answered with a growl, pacing around the hallway for the nth time. He was sure he was doing a perfect representation of a high frequency sinusoidal wave by now, did he turn into alternating electric current? Tesla approves… Wasn’t there a meditation technique in which people walked back and forth? Wow, much ohms.

With a click, the door opened and Marinette gestured for him to get in.

When he entered, she put her hand on his shoulder and pushed him to stand beside her in front of his father.

“Adrien, mademoiselle Dupain-Cheng has brought to my attention that you’re not quite satisfied with our actual arrangement in regards to the use of your time, and my expectations about your future in the company. Is that how you feel?” It was strange…To see real concern in that usually cold face; he didn’t seem disappointed or indifferent, he honestly wanted his input. Feeling his mouth go dry, he just nodded in affirmation trying to make himself look small. “I see. Taking this into consideration, we both have reached a compromise. As of now you’ll be spared from Chinese lessons and basketball, one sport is more than enough to keep you fit and it makes no sense to reach an advanced understanding of the language if you do not intend to take over the company someday, your current level is enough. Fencing and piano stays, no further debate. You’ll keep on modeling the rest of the season and once it’s done your contract will be… Reevaluated…” Adrien, looked amazed at that, was he finally going to be set free? “Don’t get funny ideas, no son of mine will become a slob, I will still be in charge of your clothing and you’ll be required to work with your partner on the time slotted to these activities in your schedule.” The blond sent a questioning look at Marinette, was he for real? She half winked half smiled in return. “I have high expectations about your performance and I will retire any or all of these measures if you fail in your venture.”

He put his best poker face at that, he had absolutely no idea what he was expected to work in.

“As for mademoiselle Dupain-Cheng, she suggested an assessment by a cognitive behavior therapist to help with your social…Issues… We’ll discuss that in a later date. For now she’ll have to sign several agreements, and will be held responsible if anything were to happen to you under her supervision. If that’s all, you both may retire.”

Was this a dream? Did he get controlled by another akuma? What was going on? He felt a hand dragging him away and decided to make himself heard for once.

“Father! Thank you so much, you won’t regret this!” He heard a phone ring behind him as they finally went into his bedroom. Once safely inside he enveloped her in a crushing hug.

“I can’t believe it! I’m so happy I could just kiss you right now!” His excitement got lost in track when he felt her whole weight press into him as she collapsed, the folder falling and sliding across the floor.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's funny because I know what they talked about and you don't ;D


	4. Chapter 4

He stared at her sleeping figure from his vantage point, his concentration was absolute and nothing could distract him from his endeavor; curled up in the darkness of his room, green eyes glowing with interest towards her face.

 

He had read the contents of the folder thoroughly and found himself impressed to say the least. The whole document was about sixty pages long and contained a Gantt chart, a public survey, product design, legal regulations, marketing strategy and possible investors. All of that oriented to hero themed merchandise for French kids enamored with Ladybug and Chat Noir; from action figures to pajamas. If he played his cards well enough, he’d be able to be the first person to own an authentic ladybug themed eye mask made by ladybug herself; of course, he’d put it on backwards to see her first thing in the morning, every day.

 

He was starting to get bored…

 

Slowly, he reached out to poke at her cheek with the tip of his fingers, slightly increasing the pressure at the lack of reaction. Who knew she was such a heavy sleeper? He tried to shake the bed a little, to no avail; finally, when all hope was lost, he swatted at her nose.

 

“Ugh! Wha-?!” Quickly he drew back the offending limb while she took in her surroundings; her eyes scanned the room in a single swipe only lingering on him and the open door for a few seconds before clarity overcame her drowsiness.

 

“Hello there, you’re looking _meowrgeous_. Slept well?” He supported his jaw on his hands in what he hoped was a suave move.

 

“Chat… What are you… Doing?” Certainly, she was speaking about him being on top of a mountain of pillows that were carefully placed on her, no doubt about it. Her tone betrayed annoyance, though.

 

“Well, this is my pillow fort and I’m supposed to keep an eye on you; therefore, you are under _see-iege_.” She tensed and let out a sigh. Okay, wrong answer. ”You _purrety_ much went faint over my glorious beauty, so I freaked out and went for Nathalie and she said that you fell asleep and I can understand that because I read your project for our façade and I can’t believe you managed to put that together in two days and… woa…”

 

“Oh…That! We can’t exactly meet at school empty handed. Tikki helped, though.”

 

“Yeah, she said something like that before eating my candy and falling asleep as well. Are you meewling better?”

 

“I guess…” With that, she tried to wriggle free from her comfy prison, to discover she was trapped. She stared at him, wide eyed, damn near offended. “Can you get off already? What’s with these pillows anyway?”

 

“Well, no; I wasn’t joking when I said you’re under siege. I didn’t scent the room and cover the windows with all my blankets for your benefit so you can run off and start working like a madbug once again. La-d-y down and relax. Hey, you can tell me about your weekend!”

 

“Weekend? I had to spend all my free time between the bakery and the hero planning and guess what? Someone decided that it wasn’t enough to be catering an anniversary so he made an awfully complicated request and I only have until tomorrow to get the ingredients or we’ll have to refund. Then after that’s out of the way I have to prepare the menu for a graduation; I can’t afford to be idle! So, if you’ll excuse me, I really need to go ba…”

 

“Thank you!”

 

“Erm… What?”

 

“I said: Thank you.”

 

“Sorry, I don’t understand.”

 

“How come? You got me out of Chinese and basketball, maybe even modeling. Am I going about this the wrong way? How do normal people show their gratitude? Is that why I have to see a therapist?” He tilted his head while frowning, trying to answer his own question, which proved to be a challenge on itself. Marinette blinked quickly for a moment, confused, until she wasn’t anymore.

 

“Pfft, since when are we meant to act normal towards each other?” She raised her eyebrow in amusement but faltered at his smirk.

 

“Oh, then I can buy you a truckload of fabrics.”

 

“O-of course not! That’s crazy!”

 

“What about a small flower shop?”

 

“Why would I even want that?”

 

“A new sewing machine?”

 

“No! No way am I letting you spend that much money. Are you just naming whatever comes to mind?”

 

“Yeah, and I’m running out of options! Spa day? Come on, throw me a mouse here.”

 

Plagg decided to intervene just then, screaming from inside the trash bin.

 

“ _Just end this suffering already!_ ”

 

“Uuugh, fine!”

 

“Yes!”

 

“As long as it’s on discount and nowhere luxurious.”

 

“Party pooper… I’ll see what I can find…” Then he got the greatest idea ever. “Though, if you want a sweet deal; this humble servant could be your personal masseur, it’s a life time offer: 99% off and free shipping. You know, I wouldn’t pass up an offer like that.” To add on it, he moved his brows suggestively.

 

“I fail to see how a person with claws would do anything but prick peoples back. Anyways, I really have to go back. But first, rules at school!”

 

“What? Already? Can’t it wait?” He deflated instantly.

 

“No! First and most important: We act the same as before towards each of our alter egos. No nicknames out of mask, no names in them. No random visits any time. No joking or flirting at school.”

 

The blonde seemed as if he’d swallowed a lemon. He proceeded to mumble. “Right, take all the fun of knowing who you are away from me. Why don’t you fire me while we’re at it.”

 

“Come on, sourpuss. The status quo did nothing to deserve that treatment.”

 

“Maybe the status quo should step up its game at being interesting.”

 

“Maybe you should appreciate that it keeps our friends and families safe from our line of work.”

 

He had no argument against that, so he sat up freeing her, crossed his arms and looked away.

 

“Yeah, fine…Go on.”

 

“If we’re together when an akuma appears, one of us has a head start of at least ten minutes; we can’t afford to go missing at the same time anymore. If one of us sees an akuma and is away from the other, we give a call and give the head start to the one who’s not supposed to be there at the time.”

 

“What?! But they’ll destroy half the city while they wait for us!”

 

Marinette stood up, determination on her stance.

 

“Chat, we _are_ heroes. But we can’t give everything away just because we have a duty. We'll be there on time, don't worry; you haven’t realized it yet, but we’re always close to each other; even when we don’t know it… Maybe that’s why the guardian chose us.”

 

“Umm… Guardian?” She just giggled at his confusion.

 

“That, my friend, is a story for another day. Oh, also. According to monsieur Agreste you’re not allowed unprotected inside a 200 meter radius of an akuma, he promised to make my life a living hell if I ‘Failed to ensure that’. I’d like to think that transforming into Chat Noir counts as protection.” With that she headed for the door, grabbing Tikki on her way. “That’s all I have for now, we’ll have to set some rules for patrol too, but not yet. See you later.” Then, she was gone.

 

He couldn’t help but wonder about what was going on in her mind, his was blank at the moment.

 

“Hey, Plagg? I think I need to kick it up a notch, she’s so busy she’s not even noticing that I’m courting her.

 

The kwami poked his head out of a pile of papers, munching on some cheese. “Are you sure about that? Maybe she’s just in denial or too used to your shenanigans.”

 

“Well, whatever it is… I’m not one to sit and do nothing. Come on, we have a few shops to visit.”


	5. Chapter 5

One can say that the beginning of the week is always such a dreadful thing with school or work or anything in between that most folks would try and sleep in. That was not the case for our hero, he’d get to be close to the most precious person in his life for the duration of the school day and that’s making him squirm in his seat. Oh what he would do to get her to speak to him, he even considered putting obstacles in her way to make her trip, only to catch her and hold her close.

 

But he knew the rules, he respected her enough to stick to them, he’d keep quiet at least until he could put his plan in motion…

 

He’d ask her out, she liked him well enough… He had lost count of all the compliments she blurted towards him whenever they talked as civilians. She liked him, maybe not romantically, but affection could develop to something more; he knew that from experience.

 

Marinette would give him a chance, he’d been sure about it since way back, when he tried to woo her as Ladybug. She had accepted to go on a date with an akuma once and they barely even spoke to each other at school; she only shrugged off Chat Noir’s advances because she thought he was joking. Now that she knew who he was she would see how much he meant it, but he had to make it perfect: If she agreed, which she would, he’d have just one opportunity to prove that he could make the perfect boyfriend for her.

 

He had to get his logistics straight, be ready for any tactical matter that she would throw at him.

 

 _Why would someone who never showed any interest suddenly become a couple with her?_ His explanation was that, since she was his friend and classmate, it wouldn’t be a stretch to tell everyone that he had been hiding a crush on her, mainly because he felt shy about it and knew that his friends would try to rush him to confess.

 

 _If they began dating it would interfere with their duty towards the city._ Not quite, the time they already spent together could be considered dating since it used most of their free time. They could use each other as alibi or even make up an alibi for the other one on the spot, since they’d be expected to know what each of them is up to at all times. It wouldn’t be out of place to ask for privacy to discuss important matters using their relationship as cover.

 

 _What if Papillon discovers their identities?_ If that happened, their safety would be compromised, no matter if they are dating or not, they’re still friends and they would go down together. He made an escape plan that would involve getting all their loved ones to safety. He was fairly proud of his idea, even if he sacrificed sleep to work on it, his lady would have done the same.

 

It was a work in progress, but he believed that he knew her priorities well enough to wing it with the rest… Though, he didn’t know what he’d do if she freaked out, which was a real possibility at the moment. He hoped that being reassuring and comforting her would be enough.

 

He had her every possible reaction in mind, to the point that he had imagined at least five different conversations with a very realistic version of his partner by the time the jammer attacked. At least that was what he heard from his screaming introduction and call upon the evils of morning traffic.

 

Adrenaline called upon him quickly as cars started turning into colored liquid across the street, with people still inside, an actual monster truck making its way over the sticky substance.

 

“Madame Bustier, I’m sorry but my parents were making a delivery by truck, I’m really worried that they got hurt by the akuma! Can I go see them?!” With a nod from the professor, she packed her things.

 

She got the head start. As she made her way out of the room he cursed himself for being too slow to make his excuse. Now he’d have to worry about her safety until he was allowed to join her. Adrien absentmindedly noticed that the monster truck was blasting some ‘sick beats’ at maximum volume. Heh… That akuma was mean versatile. At least he could watch over Ladybug from his seat, even if every question during the rest of the class was directed at him as payback for not paying attention. He didn’t mind. She was having trouble to get on the vehicle, maybe it was too fast for her? Or maybe the akuma was in the car? How would she break it without his help? What did Madam Bustier ask again?

 

“The Petrarchan sonnet is composed by two sections, an octave and a sestet. The arrangement of the sestet can be flexible but the octave is set to rhyme as a pattern of a-b-b-a-a-b-b-a.”

 

“Very well… Please try not to get distracted. I assure you that the akuma has not been reported to attack inside buildings.”

 

“Uh… I figured as much, but I still feel restless” The ten minutes were over. “Could I be excused for a bathroom break?”

 

“Fifteen minutes, no more than that.”

 

“Thanks!”

 

“Dude, are you ok?”

 

“I’ll be, don’t worry.”

 

He ran for cover and transformed as fast as he could, jumping into the fray with no hesitation, just in time for Ladybug to summon a Lucky Charm, a giant tape dispenser.

 

“This keeps happening! Why does it keep happening!?” She was suddenly stuck to the ground due to the sheer heaviness of the dispenser, which obviously meant that she was running for her life from a wheeled death machine.

 

“You know! I’ve seen my fair share of bugs squashed against the windshield. But I’ve never seen a splatted Ladybug! Get out of the way and give me your miraculous!”

 

“Never!”

 

“Don’t fret, buginette! Your handsome cat is here. I’m crashing this party!”

 

“Look at that! The road kill comes to the rescue.”

 

“Chat I need to figure out how to use this!”

 

“I’ll distract him! You look astounding when you’re exhausted, by the way! Takes my breath away!”

 

“Not the time, kitty!”

 

A jump and a dash and a pushing Ladybug out of the way and into a building was enough to catch the Jammer’s attention, so he extended his baton and made his way into the park. Maybe the trees would slow him down.

 

“I’m sick and tired of slowpokes getting in front of me! Come and fight me!”

 

Chat Noir managed to hide well enough, finally getting a chance to really look at his enemy. The monster truck was seemingly speaking from the radio inside. The wind mirrors blinked, rotating every now and then, horribly designed purple glowing eyes. Red flames and tribal patterns covered the scaly exterior.  And a curtain of smoke followed everywhere it moved.

 

“I don’t mean to be a bummer but bumps like you tire me every now and then.” He shouted from his position on top of a Horse Chesnut.

 

“There you are!”

 

In the distance he could see Ladybug making hand gestures towards the Seine. Just in time before the tree he was standing on got destroyed under the weight of the massive car.

 

He runs.

 

Racing against a speeding vehicle was quite a feat, and he was not ashamed to say that he was cheating, every now and then he’d take to the roofs to catch his breath but the Jammer would have none of it. Soon enough there was a battalion of _transformers_ looking jam creatures surrounding him as he retreated, jumped over, rolled under and blocked. None the wiser, he was still running the show. Everything was going well, until his baton got kicked away by one of the sticky minions.

“Any last words?” Bellowed the Jammer, music still blasting through the otherwise quiet street. Then it stomped on it with the intention of ending the fight, once and for all.

“Yeah.” Answered the feline. “This is a diss-traction!” A yoyo shots through the sky and pulls the hero out of sight as a traffic cone lays in his place, the tape dispenser placed inside with the cutter facing out. Three things happened next: The front left tire blows up with a deafening sound, the akuma skids over the bridge and finally it falls into a shallow part of the river.

 

A cataclysm and a miraculous cure later they part ways with a flirty one liner and a fist bump.

 

***

 

The school day continued smoothly, with Marinette returning only after lunch since she got held up helping at the bakery. As for Adrien, he had to finish fencing before being able to go on with his plan. He wondered what face she’d make once she saw the bakery covered in the roses he bought for her. He knew that the bakery closed for half an hour after the lunch rush for the bakers to eat something which would allow him to sneak in and decorating the place for his romantic confession. He even made sure that the flowers came from a good place in the case that the ladybug miraculous had side effects like sensitivity to pesticides. He could barely see with the massive box covering his face but he knew the way by heart already. He’d almost made it inside the bakery when he was stopped by a voice.

 

“Excuse me, young man. Could you tell me how to get to the 20 Arrondissement?”

 

Of course, he couldn’t bring himself to disrespect someone by not looking at them while speaking, which was the reason why he asked for a minute, placed the box inside the bakery and returned to give detailed instructions to get safely to the Cimetière du Père-Lachaise.

 

Turns out the woman was so out of place in Paris that she found enough comfort from his help to start relating him the sad tale of how she was born without a hand and spent her time rescuing dogs and was so inspired by some of the people buried in the aforementioned cemetery.

He felt glad to have been useful but he was running out of time so he thanked her for her thrust and made his way inside… Only to realize that there were at least a dozen of boxes just like the one he’d brought in just now, they were thirteen in total, figures.

 

He stared dumbfounded and immobile, and that’s how Marinette found him minutes later.

“Oh… Hello? We’re not open yet, is it an ‘emergency’?”

At his non-responsiveness she made her way behind the counter and started opening boxes. Madame Cheng called from inside the house.

 

“Dear, are those the roses and violets we ordered?!”

 

“Yes, maman! They’re here!”

 

“Can you start separating the petals? The bowls are ready in the kitchen!”

 

“I’m on it!”

 

A breeze like cold water broke him out of his shock when the girl made her way into the kitchen to retrieve a stack of glass bowls. He spewed out the first thing that came to him.

 

“Why the ragnarose?”

 

She turned to him, startled. She had forgotten about him for a second or at least that’s what he thought. Her slight blush was a sight to behold.

 

“I told you yesterday! I ordered these for the catering of that overly complicated anniversary plan some guy had. They wanted everything covered in flowers, even the food. So now I have like seventy roses to prepare and the some others to decorate… This is going to be so boring. I don’t understand people that have to cut down flowers to make a statement, I’d be perfectly happy with a potted one for my balcony-“

 

“-Help!” Bad phrasing. Maybe he’d dodged a bullet there; maybe bringing flowers was a bad idea. He’d have to try again tomorrow, maybe something less dramatic and more creative. “I mean, I can help you with work, I’d be happy to spend time with you.”

 

“Umm… That’s nice of you… Let’s bring them inside, we’re about to open again… You never told my why you came here by the way?”

 

“Huh… I just got out of fencing so I was starving! Yeah, I could use a little sugar in my system right now… But the bakery was closed.” He flinched at his awful lie; he had made sure to speak out loud for her parents to hear. Then he proceeded to rub the back of his neck. She looked at him warily. He'd get an earful later for breaking one of the rules.

 

“We could eat cookies while we get this done, my treat, since you’re helping out.” She said while lifting one of the boxes.

 

“Thanks, Marinette. You’re the sweetest.” When she rose up, she was surprised by a kiss on her cheek. With an amused snort and a shake of her head she continued on her way.


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Another day another failure, more amusement for us.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Remember that there's a playlist for your better enjoyment of this fic, each track in chapter order
> 
> https://www.deezer.com/en/playlist/2541069808

He was working overtime all throughout the night just for the chance of her appreciating his effort. He wiped some sweat from his brow, it had been really difficult to find his way around the arts and crafts, he had found himself covered in sequins and sparkles by the time the morning came. But, with some luck, it would all be worth it.

  
He could only imagine the look on her face when he surprised her with the most romantic scene his mind could muster. And once he asked the question, their love would outshine the city of lights.  
  
He spent the morning at school fidgeting from anticipation, so much that he had dropped his pen almost three times and Nino had even tried to physically restrain him out of annoyance.  
  
During lunch, he had headed straight for the park to prepare the rest of the surprise. As quickly as he could he set up a trail of sticky notes leading the way to a bench he had decorated for the occasion and, on said bench, he carefully placed a pristine and beautiful box of chocolates, the cover depicting a centuries-old image.

  
As soon as he was done, he hurried up to fetch his lady, who had to stuff the last of her bread in her mouth thinking that there was an emergency.

  
At the moment of their arrival everything was chaos, an akuma he recognized as his photographer was making his way out of the park yelling about not seeing enough pasta for his tastes. Marinette pulled Adrien to the side into a bush, reminding him that they had to deal with the akuma.  
  
Magic surrounded them with a glow and they were ready for battle, he was readying himself to charge at the retreating villain before he was stopped by an assertive voice.  
  
"Wait! He's not hurting anyone... Maybe we can see what he's mad about or at least what his powers do if we investigate the place before we confront him."  
  
He agreed with a gulp, knowing that they were sure to stumble into his surprise. Soon enough ladybug found the notes and started reading the ones that were still in place after the mess the akuma caused.  
  
"Since you fell from the sky into my life, I vowed then to one day make you my wife, I know I have no chance whatsoever, I'll never know if I never ask... Is this what I think it is?" He sucked in some air and stiffened his shoulders, preparing for the worst. "A marriage proposal! How romantic!" Then he breathed out in relief, she didn't notice. "Maybe he got rejected and Hawkmoth took advantage of him?"  
  
This was a whole new can of worms. How to explain the situation without exposing himself?  
  
"Uh, I don't think so, my lady. That was Vincent, my photographer... He loves no one, only spaghetti." He took a look around, avoiding her gaze. "I don't think this has anything to do with him, maybe he was passing by?" Just as the thought occurred to him he saw, in the cafe across the street, a very distressed looking waitress. "I think he came from there".

  
Ladybug turned around from checking out the bench's contents spilled on the ground, fury in her gaze. He felt himself shiver at the sight. "We have to go ask some questions, he better have a really good reason to be upset because he not only ruined a poor guy's proposal: He ruined a perfectly good Teuscher box. Teuscher! Can you believe it?! The gal!"

  
The akuma, called Le Traittoria had been caused by the silliest of things... The cafe had no Italian dishes on the menu, reason for which Ladybug had no pity while beating up the akuma with excessive force.

  
The day was saved, or so they thought, but when they returned to the park, even with the miraculous cure on their favor, the chocolate had melted under the sun. Not completely though, so Marinette had insisted to watch over the place at least until the unlucky lover appeared so they could try and cheer him up. Adrien knew how useless it was but he also knew how stubborn the owner of his heart could be so he waited, and waited, and waited. Only when the street lights started to light up did she admit defeat and so they went their separate ways. But he noticed when she took the praline box with her, and he hoped that at least she liked the picture on it.  


By two in the morning he was still unable to fall asleep, his failure haunting him at every turn and toss of the sheets. Realizing that there was no sense in staying there he wondered if Marinette would be awake designing again, that's how he found himself taking a stroll around the rooftops towards the bakery.  
  
"The cat's hunting method is as astute as it's silent. He stalks his prey from a vantage point and patiently waits for the perfect opportunity to leap. This particular cat has found himself a bug, and so beings the hunt." He said with his upper body inside the room while moving his legs as if to prove he was ready to jump."

  
"Chat get in here and close the hatch, you can make your dumb documentary narration without letting the cold inside." She said with an amused glance and a shake of her head.  
  
"Sorry, I didn't think it through." He smiled at her once he had settled on her chaise. "So... How's the most breathtaking bug I know doing on this fine night?" He leaned closer with half-lidded eyes and raised brows, supporting his chin in his hand.

  
"That's not the start of a joke about body odor, is it? I swear I only smell when covered in sweat from a fight."  
  
"Why would you even think that? I've never made fun of you!"  
  
"Right! Right! Just self-conscious I guess..." She giggled, covering her face. There was no answer. Seeing how much her words had upset him she turned her chair around to face him fully. "Do you remember the pralines I took home?" She whispered with a mischievous glint in her eyes.

  
"Do I? We only guarded them for hours." Sarcasm dripped from his voice.

  
"Hey don't blame me, blame Hawkmoth." She dismissed the accusatory look sent her way and kept going. "Well, since they were melted and since we have leftovers from the event I took the freedom to bake something with them, I finished just an hour ago so I was waiting for it to cool down. Do you want some?"

  
"What is it?" He tilted his head, curioser and curioser.

  
That night they went to sleep with bloated bellies from the most delicious cheesecake they had ever eaten. The candied roses, the praline glaze, and the hazelnut filling made the most wonderful mixture. There was nothing left by the time his visit ended, but he decided to blame it on the gluttonous kwamis they both had to share with.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Traittoria is a mix between traitor and Trattoria, because he felt betrayed by the restaurant.
> 
> Some sticky notes fell to the ground during the attack, the full poem is this one:
> 
> Since the day our paths tangled together,  
> since you fell from the sky into my life,  
> I have been waiting to tell you this forever  
> I'll be your knight through every strife,  
> even when our souls go back to the ether.  
> Every refusal cuts my heart like a knife,  
> I vowed then to one day make you my wife,  
> I know I have no chance whatsoever,  
> Grant me a date at least before I surrender,  
> I'll never know if I never ask.

**Author's Note:**

> I don't know how many chapters it'll have but I get the need to stamp my head against the table when I think about this plot.


End file.
